Wonderings...

I've been feeling very discouraged at my job lately. I've been having trouble putting into words why this may be, so I thought I'd try to write it out.
I know that I like kids. It's why I wanted to be a teacher. I've talked with my assistant principal and she asked me, "Why did you get into teaching?"
"Because I love kids." I respond.
"Then just love them." She replies.
It sounds so easy.
 Being a teacher is way more than just loving my students, which I do.
I get discouraged because a lot of my students have bad attitudes and bad manners and lack social grace.
Now, to be fair, I said a lot...I know that a lot of my kids are good. I'm just finding it harder and harder to focus on them. And, I also know as a teacher that I'm supposed to teach them these things that they lack. AND, I  know that they are only 13...But, in the course of a class period or a day, how is this possible?
 I also feel resentful to some of the parents. As a parent, I am teaching my children these basic social skills, so why aren't they? Yes, I know that they are probably trying. Yes, I know that a lot of them worry about where their next meal is coming from. Yes, they are probably thinking too, in the course of a day, how is this possible. But, it makes my job hard when I have to teach 40 or so kids that they should say excuse me when they bump into someone.
I also have issues with the educational system in general. I know I can't control that. That doesn't make it any easier to deal with. Something is not right in our system and things need to change.
So, my question to myself is, can I continue to be a teacher? If I leave my urban school district for a suburban one, will it be any better? Should I even be teaching? There are other ways for me to work with kids without feeling so much stress....right? I know I will figure out the right answer for myself and my family, I just hope it happens before I end up in the crazy house in a straight jacket....

Christmas traditions

My Mom has started several traditions with the kids. Which is one of my many favorite things about my Mom. She gets what it means to be an involved, caring, helpful grandparent. My kids have and will continue to have the most wonderful memories with her. Not to mention, how it touches my heart to see Mom create and participate in these traditions. 

 But, one Christmas tradition that I think is on the top of Evan's list would be making the gingerbread house. I'm not sure that my Mom had planned on making this a tradition. Except, this year Evan asked about it. So, Mom went and got the gingerbread kit and the gingerbread house making becomes an event. To add to the fun this year, each of the kids got to make a gum drop tree to go with the gingerbread house. I made it the centerpiece on our dining room table and Evan was so proud and glad to see her creation on display. I was reminded today, as I often am, that I am so lucky for all the great and wonderful things in my life. Just the simple act of displaying my daughter's work makes her so happy. My life is just about perfect as can be, I feel so blessed to be a part of this wonderful family.

Dinner conversation

Something that I have started as we eat dinner as a family is that everyone shares their favorite thing that happened for the day. There are a few stipulations...no sarcasm and you have to tell the truth...I find myself reminding Kendal of these rules more than anyone else :).
Evan had a rough afternoon today. She seemed more tired than normal and made a few bad choices before dinner. As we were sitting down to dinner tonight she seemed especially anxious to share something with me. When it was her turn to share her favorite part of the day she says, "Mom, I need to tell you something, it's not especially important." So I tell her to go ahead. She says, "I don't think Santa Clause is very happy with me." I had to try so hard not to laugh. So I asked her, "Well, why do you think that?" And she told me because she had been bad. I asked her what she could do about it. She says, "listen better".
I love that girl so much. Even when she is tired and cranky she still knows that she messed up and she really wants to fix it. Even though vocabulary and empathy don't really go together; I'm always amazed at how much she has of both.

Sundays

I truly love Sundays. They have become a day of tradition in our house. The kids go to Sunday school with their Grandma Debbie, for which I am so grateful. Grateful that she's willing to take them and that both of my children love to go.
The afternoon is spent with their PopPop and NeNe. This is a tradition that was started when Evan was a newborn, just two weeks old. My dad would come over and sit with her for a couple of hours while Kendal and I would go grocery shopping. Now it's something bigger and greater. It's an hour or two of quiet alone time for Kendal and myself. But, for my kids I believe it is something special. They have a relationship with their PopPop, and all their grandparents for that matter, that I have never experienced. To watch my kids with my Dad is a magical opportunity. Growing up I think I was too hard on my Dad. He is a wonderful PopPop, just as he is and was a wonderful Dad.

Christmas Decorations are up!

We had a wonderful day! It started with a visit to the Nifty Nuthouse where the kids were overwhelmed with the amount of candy and sugary goodness in one place. After a short, or non existent nap (depending on the child) ;), we worked on setting up our Christmas decorations. The kids love to help, and this occasion was no exception. They really enjoyed listening to Christmas tunes and hanging ornaments on the tree.